Tomorrow is the last day of school for the kids in Pasco County. I arrived this morning at Lacoochee School with my dog, Lola, and a cooler full of home made ice cream and blueberries to top it off. I could tell right off that this was the end game, no one was teaching the pitiful scripted lessons and the rubber band had gone slack. The kids were thrilled to see my little dog and get a chance to pet her. Some of them asked if she had mange or fleas (no, and no). These kids have dogs in their families but they don't know about a well cared for and well behaved dog. (This dog is probably better cared for than they are!) Lola went about her business of caring for kids (she was raised in a classroom.) When I read a story to the children, Lola was cuddled up between the kids, everyone happy.
Then it was time to go to the awards assembly in the cafeteria. We told Lola to go into her kennel and guard the classroom. Ms. Yager's kids hunkered down on the bleacher seats to await the awards. I sat among them, and these good and patient children really thought they would get an award. They duly applauded each child who got an award, but really, they were awaiting their turn. The principal and the vice principal looked spiffy and beautiful in their pointy shoes and amazingly voluminous hairdos. They smiled a lot, and clearly, they were enjoying this time when kids were being affirmed. There were a lot of grand awards for just being there. And we all know that 90 percent of success is being there. And there were other awards in art and music and reading (NOT math, or history, or, or..) The kids next to me were getting more and more itchy as the ceremony went on. Most of the kids getting awards were Anglos, and a few black kids. For the most part, the Hispanic kids were left in the dust.
The kids near me started to lean all over me.They whispered things to me. One child started to cry. I snaked my arm around behind him and stroked his neck. At this moment I could envision some kind of magical realism in which, strangely enough, an angel would appear to each child bearing a huge trophy of affirmation.
Except for one child, who got a two foot trophy for perfect attendance, none of CareyAnne's kids got an award. I would have loved to see this whole class get an award for 'heart'. This was a very hard class, and it would be difficult for anyone to deal with these kids every day. But CareyAnne did, so magnificently, with such love and creativity. In my mind she gets a ten foot trophy.
I have learned so much this year, volunteering in a title one school. I am humbled and awed to think I know so little about the hardships of these good and patient parents and their children. I am dismayed to see the mediocrity of leadership and the teachers (who can't often speak grammatically, nor read!) And yet, these people are out there, working hard, trying their best in a joyless situation.
I think that I may have burned my bridges at Lacoochee, (Surely, someone from there may have read this blog?) Certainly, for the whole year, no one in the administration at Lacoochee has ever spoken to me, ever thanked me for volunteering, or ever thanked me for providing funds for field trips. Just seems odd. And, there is a big part of me that thinks that I should not expect any thanks for anything.
So, Happy Times, Lacoochee Elementary School. I am interested in you, I love the kids, I want to be there, but it is really hard to be a volunteer without any affirmation whatsoever.
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