We have heard and seen so much about the carnage at Virginia Tech this week, maybe too much. The kids there have been spectacular and articulate in the midst of such a terrible event. Everyone weeps to think of losing a part of our best and brightest. And we weep to think about the unspeakable end of life for that troubled young man, Cho.
It is understandable to want to fix the blame on this somewhere. Do we need to have more accountability from gun dealers? Could campus security have been better? And on and on.
What I wonder is where were adults when this troubled child didn't speak? Cho came to the U.S.A. when he was eight. When he was 23 he killed 32 people. I have not read or heard anywhere about his life in elementary school. Was he speaking then? According to an article in the New York Times today, at least a few relatives in South Korea were worried about him. Where were neighbors and friends and teachers in the U.S.A as this child struggled in a new place, trying to learn a new language and culture?
As a teacher for many years, I must ask those teachers who had Cho in their classes, "Didn't you notice anything? Did you wonder why this child did not speak? Did you talk to his parents? Did you engage the other children in a plan to help him? Did you get psychiatric help for an obviously troubled child? Did you try to love and understand him? Why didn't you act?" None of the media stories help me on this.
When Lorenzo came to Lacoochee School with a gun a month ago, there was some hesitation, but fairly soon the event was given the weight it deserved. Bringing a gun to school was obviously a cry for help.(Not to mention threatening!). Lorenzo was put into the hands of a counselor every morning. His cry for help was noted, even in this poor rural school.
We live in such a populous world! We must train our children to take care of each other and be aware of our fellows. (The Catholic church and the British have good reason to think that seven or eight is a good age for kids to have their first communion or begin school.) I am sometimes exasperated with those kids who 'tattle' on others. I should rejoice! These kids have got it about the way they think they and others should behave. They are positively not going to become shooters of dozens. At eight they already have the basics of knowing right from wrong. The kids I am concerned about never 'tattle'. Did anyone ever see this about Cho?
One thing I think we could do for our young people in college is to let them know during their orientation that they really are responsible for each other, and that means having to do hard things sometimes. There could be an anonymous hot line for a student to speak of his/her concerns about a fellow student. Of course this assumes that the student's concerns would be followed up.
During my sophomore year in college, I was in a triple room. One of my roommates clearly had some major issues, not homicidal, but troubling. In that easier world, we were able to get help for her. The college was helpful like kind of distant and concerned parents.
In our time now, we send our kids off and they are totally free agents. That is good in a way. Maybe our institutions of higher learning now need to take the time to help these young people wend their way in a hugely more populous world. Young people today aren't magically more mature than I was at that age. But I do know they are a part of a much more complicated world.
We need to try everything under the sun to make people of whatever age and station understand the necessity of being responsible for each other. We need to start early!
No comments:
Post a Comment