Tuesday, January 15, 2013

Everyone Wants Money

Most of the calls I receive these days are from people wanting money:  requests from paramedics and police in our community, the democrats, the environment, my college, breast cancer, all kinds of other worthy causes.

 But I have donor fatigue. If I give money to a particular cause all I get in response is a request for more and more. So, sometimes I listen to the pitch, and feel guilty as I say no to right now. Sometimes the folks who are earnestly making the pitch engage me. "So, can I put you down for a thousand bucks?" I think of these young people who are manning the phone banks who have been schooled to make the "Ask". Sometimes, I quietly hang up. I cannot deal with this. Sometimes I tell them that, quite frankly, I do not have the money, but thanks for asking.

When I attend community meetings, most of what we discuss is fundraising. These groups need money! Funds enable kids to make a trip to Washington, D.C., and play football.  Funds enable the community to furnish a community center or provide meals for needy kids, or make it possible for children to get dental care.

Everyone needs money! And I know money is out there. There are many small grants in reach. There are many prosperous people who would willingly give to a cause. There are many people who can buy expensive cars or boats or whatever, but never really think about how far a hundred bucks could go to fund a kid for a soccer club or three hundred meals on wheels. 

We need to have a redistribution of money in this society. Lots of people- the haves- just don't think about it. Our American society is very generous. We just need to be constantly reminded. When the media highlights a story about a kid needing a lung transplant, money pours in . When the media has a story about a miserable dog that was shot with an arrow, or was spurned by our governor, money pours in.

We all do what we can, generous Americans that we are.

But I am not picking up the phone for Telefund - ever!

Everyone Wants Money

Most of the calls I receive these days are from people wanting money:  requests from paramedics and police in our community, the democrats, the environment, my college, breast cancer, all kinds of other worthy causes.

 But I have donor fatigue. If I give money to a particular cause all I get in response is a request for more and more. So, sometimes I listen to the pitch, and feel guilty as I say no to right now. Sometimes the folks who are earnestly making the pitch engage me. "So, can I put you down for a thousand bucks?" I think of these young people who are manning the phone banks who have been schooled to make the "Ask". Sometimes, I quietly hang up. I cannot deal with this. Sometimes I tell them that, quite frankly, I do not have the money, but thanks for asking.

When I attend community meetings, most of what we discuss is fundraising. These groups need money! Funds enable kids to make a trip to Washington, D.C., and play football.  Funds enable the community to furnish a community center or provide meals for needy kids, or make it possible for children to get dental care.

Everyone needs money! And I know money is out there. There are many small grants in reach. There are many prosperous people who would willingly give to a cause. There are many people who can buy expensive cars or boats or whatever, but never really think about how far a hundred bucks could go to fund a kid for a soccer club or three hundred meals on wheels. 

We need to have a redistribution of money in this society. Lots of people- the haves- just don't think about it. Our American society is very generous. We just need to be constantly reminded. When the media highlights a story about a kid needing a lung transplant, money pours in . When the media has a story about a miserable dog that was shot with an arrow, or was spurned by our governor, money pours in.

We all do what we can, generous Americans that we are.

But I am not picking up the phone for Telefund - ever!

Wednesday, January 09, 2013

Warm Weather!

 I am foolishly crazy about growing our vegetable garden. I love those collards, so huge and resplendent now. Today I discovered a whole bunch of cauliflowers, already heading nicely. You would think that I would label what I have planted. But I do not. I love the wild abandon and the surprises when I find a whole row of carrots ready to pick! I love finding some of the last of the season's peppers, and those tomatoes left from the summer still top our salads. My goal is to plant something every day. Today I buried a bunch of sprouting potatoes and in a few weeks they'll be sprouting.
I work in the garden and spend a few minutes admiring the beauty of a lettuce bed with all its textures and colors. Sometimes I look out over the wonderful pristine landscape beyond the garden, and I am entirely happy.

Growing vegetables (and anything else!) takes time and sweat. I love planting and watering stuff but I hate the weeding and removal of spent vegetation. But it's all part of the process. My mate actually turned over the compost pile a few days ago, so now we have a really good mixture to use on the vegetables.

Our community garden also is doing famously and feeding lots of folks. The school kids work diligently with the plants and are taking home broccoli, collards, beans and other vegetables.

This evening I went out to our garden and picked broccoli for my supper. The coyotes were beginning to howl in the distance and the bats were flying around. Today's high was close to ninety degrees, way warmer than usual for this time of the year. It scares me. I love having this extended growing season and all the tremendous greenness, but I know in my heart that in ten days we could have a freeze. I like things to be normal.

Tomorrow I shall pick huge quantities of vegetables and take them to friends. It's great to be the idiosyncratic old lady who grows things!

Saturday, January 05, 2013

About Gifts

Here is one of the best gifts ever. It did not come at Christmas, but sometime, just because. My best friend, Marie, gave me this orchid several years ago because she knew I love orchids and care for them with love and attention. This magnificent one now blooms twice a year and delights me over and over. To me, this orchid is the perfect gift: it was given with love, not to mark any particular moment or holiday, and she knew I would love it. She was right.

We have come to the end of this American holiday season when we all go into paroxysms of guilt and longing for the perfect gift for everyone. We spend too much on crap. The wrappings have been torn off, and most of the stuff hidden under those amazing, colorful, carbon emitting, and costly wrappings have long been assigned to the back of the closet, or exchanged for something we really wanted, and in the right size.

I do this too. I make my to-give list for family and friends, and I send stuff off to them. I do not want them to think me churlish or ungiving. I want them to think well of me (maybe).

Some people are extraordinary gift givers, and they love the opportunity! I think of my sister, Maria, who listens in July when I say to her that what I really would like is a statue of St. Francis for my garden. So, at Hannukah, this perfect statue appears! I think of my sister-in-law, Nancy, who knows I love those certain pears, sends them at Christmas. I think of my daughter who makes home-made items I love - and give them to us at Christmas. Why Christmas?

What are REAL gifts?  We don't really know how to ask for what we want! When you'd really like some cash to pay a baby sitter, you get a hand cream dispenser. When you'd really like some cash to pay for car repairs you get a hood for your snow-blower. When you'd really like some some help with computer issues, you get hand-made soap.

Dear Abby is full of folks complaining about the lack of thanks for these things. I kind of know where they are coming from. Yeah, no one thanks anyone anymore, and momentarily I think that nevermore will I send this or that for the dutiful Christmas gift, since it seems they don't care. (neither do I!)

I have made donations to Heifer in the name of giving those folks a hive of bees or a goat to make a difference in the third world. But whatever it is - goats, bees, a new bike, big part of a tuition for college, checks, keyboard, it's all the same- just stuff. So, now I just send my donations to these organizations straight. You just do what you do because it is the right thing to do.

So, I come back to gift giving. Why are we so consumed with this during the holidays?

I have many friends with whom I do not exchange gifts, cards, or anything for the holidays. And yet, we would do anything for each other!

At Christmas, for the first time away from home in fifty years, we were with our son and young family in their home. The amount of gifts under the tree was prodigious! I was particularly amazed with the expensive gifts of clothing and small electric things the outlying family gave to each other. Lots of this was probably stuff they needed. But I could not help thinking about their credit card debt for all this loot! I was warmed by the total caring and attention these folks had for each other. I have a lot to learn!

Giving in the holiday season is an affirmation of being a consumer. My partner, in his quiet way, does not participate in Christmas. He knows that I will do the minimum to keep the troops quiet. Sometimes in the heeby-jeebies of the night I wish he would give me a gift of something he thought I would love, something inviting that I didn't have to tell him. But he gives me the gift of self. What more could anyone want?


Thinking about Gifts